And it hurts. No facebook has turned out to be much harder than skipping my morning cup of coffee. As long as I get Betty (my MINI cooper) past the one and only Starbucks on my route to work, I'm good the rest of the day. Facebook though, that's a whole different level of difficult. I sign on in the morning, check my phone app, look again mid-morning when most of facebook is awake and has made an update that I apparently cannot live without. I check my phone app again, then lunch time ... you get the point, I'm always on my damn facebook account. This has mostly just pointed out what a snoop I am. Of the 250 some "friends" I have, I probably only truly care about 50 of them. That's 200 people I "stalk" and don't truly care about. I look at their wall posts, see new pictures of their kids, and then I sign off my account with some kind of satisfaction. The more I type the sicker it sounds. Damn. Perhaps facebook was a great thing to give up for 40+ days.
Moving on from that, I have an awesome cold. The kind that I can't justify skipping work for because I'm virtually in no pain, it's just annoying as hell. Having no voice, no appetite, and coughing; it's a good time, let me tell you. Well, you know, I'm sure you've been there. And let's face it, if I stayed home I'd just eat away my PTO and become slowly more obsessed with Kelly Ripa (If it's not one obsession it's another), not to mention lose my desk in a sea of paper.
Moving forward again. I've thought about purchasing a hand recorder (no clue if that's it's true title) so that I could actual capture some of my thoughts to blog about. I have these great ideas as I listen to XM and sit in traffic, but with my memory (lack thereof), it is so far gone by the time I sit here. Which, as we know, is only once every 21 days or so. I love putting my words in text, you'd think this would be my obsession. (Light bulb).
Let's see ... what is notable? I missed the Shamrock run due to previously mentioned cold. Honestly, didn't feel too bad about it. Shamrock may be the most overrated race I've ran. There will be no signing up next year unless the birthday girl (Shelly) insists.
I've thought of making a list of 30 things to do in my next decade. There is another social networking website (yes, a new website obsession. Lord I need help) http://www.mylifelist.org/ where you list such things and then share when/ how you achieved them. Maybe that's a stupid idea ... the website part. I'll keep thinking on that one.
Josh recently had 500 days of sobriety. Five hundred days. That is unreal to me, that March will be 17 months!! I look at my family and see how easily alcoholism tore it apart. All the relationships that were once good are now ... different. How quickly life went from being innocent and fun to chaotic and scary. It took love, trust, and safety right from our arms. Without experiencing other diseases, I can't say confidently it's the worst. It's the worst in my world. But Josh's sobriety has shown me that those things aren't all lost, that one can come back from such a place. It makes my eyes wet. My whole being is so proud of him, so happy for him. We have the life we do today, which is a damn good life, because of both of our recoveries. Although mine feels so much slower than his. Although I know Al-Anon has brought me far.
And with that I will close. I've been sitting here for over an hour, most of that time was spent find Mraz videos. Happy Season of Lent. I hope it's going easier for you than it is for me.
